No more dating Djs

NO more dating djs

no more dating djs, mcs, producers, hiphop critics, radio hosts, etc

Wanted: a girl to date a dj 

must have strong arms for heavy lifting  

includes crates & my ego 

looks not important to me  

you will never look as good as the girls on my bootlegs, white labels & cd covers 

but please try not to look uglier than any of my dj buddy's girlfriends 

I really hate that 

DON'T TOUCH MY EQUIPMENT 

I like music, 

long walks on any street that sells used records, 

music, 

being a hater,

music,

and I do like music  

must be able to watch several hours of DMC World Championship video footage 

PS: if you've never heard of dj rectangle, 

please do not apply.  

I'm done with dating rappers, mcs, djs, 

I'm looking for a real nice rodger's cable guy 

who thinks a technique is a way to make love to me 

I was in love with your potential 

I thought your hands were speaking to me 

remember when we met an you were on that jungle brother's back to Africa trip? 

you got me to throw away my rope chain 

even took chemicals out my hair 

you said you were my man 

and we would be a strong black unit of change  

but your mamma's basement was too small to oust a revolution 

grown a** manbut why move out & get a job? 

you said you were about to make some cheddar of all this rappin' & producin' 

wait till you play me the new ssheee*t  

you said the sexiest thing 'bout me besides my fat a**

was the way I made you think 

& me and my fat a** was tickled pink

but now it seems that mic chords are the only things you tickle. 

I'm tired of eating invisible scratch pickles 

I stopped buying your mix tapes the day you said girls can't dj 

because their inner ear is smaller and it throws off the mixes

[bleep] a guest list 

after 3 years 

I'm more than just a guest  

but I guess you just aint know  

I stopped analyzing your lyrics when you stopped listening to my radio show 

and don't ever get it twist  

I'm telling you  

the worst groupies have di*ks 

every guy i know can tell a story about a h* and a rap star 

"I ain't hating, it's the truth dog, I witnessed it, I swear" 

now your'e a man 

at least for the groupie she about to give sex 

you already passed your tape to the rapper 

he's about to beat the things now 

why are you still there? 

and these groupie h*s  

with their 5 minute hugs 

I don't watch no face 

but these girls take pleasure in provoking me 

and I can't say [bleep]  

I got to retaliate in silence 

because the lanyard from your backstage pass keeps on choking me  

and NO  

I don't wanna hang out with the other dj girlfriends 

they're adapters  

automatic after-performance clappers  

preparation-h for swollen ego [bleep] rappers 

they adapt to any climate  

given [bleep] about any time it seems appropriate 

you take these girls for joke  

skin tease like the two a you-all gon' live happy ever after 

they study dinosaurs 

we call them dino wh*res 

why? 

cause that's what you call the girls who flock to the clubs on a saturday night 

to do what she can to catch a toronto raptor 

she's an adaptor  

you can take you know yellow pagin' dubplate makin' body tricks 

but personally 

I'll pass  

used to give a [bleep] about turntablism 

but now you could basically 

galloping scratch 

my a**  

I know I sound amplified 

you can tell your friends 

it's just 

hey  

remember when you broke my face plate?  

[bleep] the best mixer you ever had was a jemini 

and it's not the dj 

it's me for thinking he's listening to what he play 

and the messages he's putting in the universe 

but when really I think about it 

what you say & who you are 

I mean  

loop is still singin' about girls 

so ladies  

the fault also lies in us  

if we mistake talent for tenderness 

a beat is not a love song 

a guest list is not a love letter 

but until i'm sure i've learned the difference

i just won't date djs, mcs, producers, hiphop critics, radio hosts, etc